"You're just rude"

Hello, how’s everyone?

I am actually really googling that, let me share a few interesting things I've found.

Why are people rude? 

1.     Some people don’t want to be good to others — they just want others to be good to them. 

"When I was rude to other people, it was because I was afraid they wouldn’t like the nice me. I didn’t mind if they were angry at the fake, unkind me, because it really wasn’t me."

2.     Some people are naturally evil.

3.     Rude and abusive people have apologists to defend them. It is also seen in those people who shift blame away from the aggressor and onto victims.
“Well, you should have stood up for yourself!”

4.     "I even became prone to insulting people as a way of protecting myself if they didn’t like me." 

5.     Some people learned their manners from sitcoms – “funny rude person”. (I don’t get it how they want to make others laugh by insulting others. Really?) 

After reading a few articles, I am slowly understanding why people can be really rude. I mean, it is them. We have to understand rudeness as a habit. Some of the reasons I've read was their parents' fault, but nah, let’s just put that aside alright? We neither have the power to change them nor to stop them from being rude. (On the contrary, I can be rude too, so I'll learn along.) Some will feel great, feel like a rewarding rush once they’re able to make their victim cry. Usually, their victim is the ones that are unable or unwilling to stand up for himself/herself. 

We can't escape from all these people. They're still your friends, and one day, they are the ones you need. 

I am just sad that I am the victim. Sometimes I wonder, why did I not stand up for myself? Why did I not stay away from them?

Well, because they're my friends. They're the ones I really cherish the most, hence I gave in. I then poisoned myself. 

So... how do we deal with rude people?

Even in our Quran said that, "And if you had been rude (in speech) and harsh in heart they would have disbanded from about you."

Let's try to limit our contact with them as much as possible. Out of sight, out of mind. 

The best way also is to fight rudeness with kindness. Stay friendly, and helpful giving other person a chance to calm down and adjust their behaviour with ours.

I also have to never take it personally even though it is personal. We all have a choice to react. 

"Take the power out of their rudeness by choosing to treat it as their problem, not your problem." 

And lastly, I have to constantly remind myself to never overthink the situation. I have to draw the line and accept that I have done as much as possibly could to improve relations with them. Don't overanalyze your behavior or theirs, your history of interactions, etc. 

Someone who is so hurtful towards you does not deserve any more of your energy.

After all, no one is perfect. We can't escape from being rude, but we can limit ourselves too. I'd admit I was rude and I can be rude. I have learnt a lot really. Let's hope for a great week, Allah wills. Amin.

Sources: 

http://www.wikihow.com/Deal-With-Rude-People

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/10-smart-ways-deal-with-rude-people.html

http://jebrown.us/Relationshop/WhyArePeopleRude.html

http://tinybuddha.com/blog/why-people-are-rude-and-unkind-and-why-its-not-about-you/

http://quran.com/3/159